The Onion Spoofs Twilight

Thanks to Terri and Emily for pointing this out to us.

According to the Onion (well known for its biting sarcasm, satire, and humor):

“Acknowledging years of marital dissatisfaction and a noticeable increase in her vampire husband’s weight, 43-year-old Sara Pastor told reporters Thursday that she often seeks solace by losing herself in the escapist fantasy of the Twilight novels.The Pastors settle in for what has become a typical Friday night together.

The New Orleans resident said it’s been ages since her husband, 834-year-old Andrei Pastor, bought her flowers, took her dancing, or appeared at her second-story window and charmed her into allowing him inside. According to Sara, she purchased the first book in Stephenie Meyer’s young-adult vampire romance series 14 months ago, while waiting for her husband to pick her up from the airport, and has taken refuge in the novels ever since….”

See the whole spoof on The Onion

See You in Seattle and Candace Charee Needs You!

The Creation Entertainment Official Twilight Convention that is being held this weekend in Seattle is shaping up to be quite the event. Currently slated there are appearances by Peter Facinelli, Chaske Spencer, Alex Meraz, Bronson Pelletier, Kiowa Gordon, Dan Cudmore, and Charlie Bewley.

Pel will be making the Lexicon’s three presentations, and she’s also be joining Twilight Facebook’s Lauren on a panel. Another newcomer to the official convention this weekend is Lana Veenker. If you have acting aspirations, this is one panel you DON’T want to miss.  Lana (who helped to cast Twilight) will be talking about the realities of the film business and how you can get involved without getting ripped off!

Now if you are going, Friday night’s concert entertainer is Candace Charee, and she needs some volunteers to be ” back up dancers for my show lol just like 2-4 people on stage being silly and acting like a part of my show.” Candace is a great singer with a fun personality, so if you are game you can contact her at [email protected]  or via her MySpace (which, check it out anyway because it gives you a sampling of her music).

Forks Police Chief Loses Job

Forks Chief of Police for the last decade, Mike Powell has lost his job according to the Forks Forum. Newly elected mayor, Bryon Monohon, dismissed Powell.  Monohon, who just took office on January 1, 2010  issued the official statement, “I have determined that there is a need for new leadership in the Forks Police Department. As a result, and pursuant to FMC 2.30.010, I have dismissed Mike Powell from the position of Chief of Police for the City of Forks…In the days ahead I will be further assessing the direction and structure of the Forks Police Department.  In addition, I will be developing my expectations for the new chief of police in relationship to the operations of the Forks Police Department.”

Many Twilight fans have encountered Powell over the years and his afflable nature regarding the Twilight Saga and Charlie comparisons. He routinely would pose for picture and “arrest’ fans when asked time permitting. We met Mike last Summer while attending the Summer School in Forks Symposium and captured this video of him talking about how Twilight has impacted his life.

Twilighters Mobilizing For Hatian Disaster Relief

Actors such as Chaske Spencer have tweeted about donating money is as simple as sending a text message.

The Thinking of Rob Blog is currently leading the charge. They have an excellent detailing of what is needed and how you can help. From our experience in the Harry Potter Fandom, it’s a great thing when sites can come together and raise money for a humanitarian cause. The Harry Potter fandom did this for both the Boxing Day Tsunami and Hurricane Katrina.  Tens of thousands of dollars were raised.

Please vistit that Thinking of Rob blog and help anyway you can. The images coming out of Haiti are gruesome to say the least.

What’s even more crucial is that the need is going to be there months from now.   We are going to be putting together a Twilight themed basket to auction off for this cause, proceeds to the Red Cross. Details will follow next week.

EDITED: One of our regular readers works with Doctors Without Borders. This organization is already onsite and providing aid.

Stephenie Meyer Addresses Breaking Dawn Rumors

stephe

This was just posted on Stephenie Meyer’s personal website:

Just a quick note on the subject of the Breaking Dawn film: there is no drama over whether the book should be one movie or two. My personal feeling is that it would be very difficult to cram the whole story into one movie (as I’ve said in many interviews previous to this), but if a great way of doing that surfaces, I’m all for it. Two or one, whichever way fits the story best is fine by me, and everyone I’ve spoken with at Summit seems to feel the same way. We’re all excited to move forward on this, and we are slowly and surely getting there. I know people are anxious for news, and so sometimes gossip get fabricated to stir things up, but there’s no basis to this particular story.

Steph”

Yesterday, prior to this LA Times article appearing, E!’s The Awful Truth column ran a story that was then widely quote that Stephenie Meyer was essentially the only stumbling block to a movie not being announced. The E! story concluded with a statement directly addressing Stephenie Meyer: “… Steph, just some more food for thought: If you put the kibosh on an extra Twilight film, Twi-hards are going to have your rich little booty for din-din! Trust us, you’ll be skinned alive, diced, fried and then flambéed alive.

These are fans you do not want to disappoint.”

Yellow Hankerchief Trailer

There are also still photos and a great write up over on MTV’s Hollywood Crush.

The Littlest Twilight Fan

RPatzNews Tweeted about this and it’s pretty funny, not quite the dancing YouTube baby, but still…in retrospect maybe she’s more the youngest Robert Pattinson fan.  The video kind of reminds me of a kid I used to babysit for back in the day, only then it was Shawn Cassidy and not Rob. Around the 3:15 mark or so is a moment.

Collider Interviews Peter Facinelli on Carlise, Coop, and Twitter

Question: Does Carlisle have a lot to do in Eclipse?

PETER FACINELLI: Yes, he does a lot. A lot more than the first two films, for sure. You know, what I like about the third movie is that you get to see a side of Carlisle you haven’t seen before. You actually get to see what his vampire capabilities are because there’s some great battle sequences. It’s my favorite book.

When do you hear about Breaking Dawn?

FACINELLI: I don’t know. Usually the fans know before I do, so I’m sure I’ll see it on the internet before I get the phone call.

Is Twitter part of your job now?

FACINELLI: No, I just enjoy what Twitter is because I can really connect with the fans. It’s a great way to share information with them and it’s also a great way to entertain. I like being able to put a smile on people’s faces and I like being able to also mix that up with sharing information with them that’s important, and also letting them know what I’m doing. I’ve had people come to me and say, “Hey, will you tweet this out?” There’s like pay advertisement stuff. I’m not into that. I like to keep my Twitter pure. I don’t want to sell my followers anything. I want to be able to have that fan base so I can tell them what I’m doing and entertain them.

See the rest on Collider.

Win a Pair of Sneakers Designed by Boo Boo Stewart

You have to be under 21 to enter this contest being held over at J-14.

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse star BooBoo Stewart designed a really rad pair of sneaks — and we’ve got two pairs for lucky fashionistas!”

Check out the details here.

Cameron Bright on Vampire Radio Tonight

Cameron Bright will be on the Vampire Radio program tonight.  Listeners can call in to ask questions.

According to the VRO main website, “Jan 12th Cameron Bright Joins us for an ‘Open’ Interview. If you would like to call in to talk to Cameron we ask that you email us at [email protected]. The ones who email us will be the first calls picked up.”

You can find the call in number and/or listen in online here.