David Slade In the Future

Last night David Slade posted a series of comments on Twitter about what life would be like in the future. From our perspective it’ sort of a rant where Brave New World meets antagonized director microblogging. See for yourself:

“IN THE FUTURE artificial intelligence google apps will tell us whether we are indeed reading real news or just a blog.

IN THE FUTURE ai [Lexion note: we assume ai means artificial intelligence] apps will be grade online journalism for its accuracy, poignancy, grammar and quality of writing.

IN THE FUTURE online ai grading will lead to the demise of blogging and the new rise of quality journalism.

IN THE FUTURE actors will have tiny GPS trackers positioned all over their skin so they can act in performance capture anywhere they want.

IN THE FUTURE there will be no need for actors.

IN THE FUTURE there will be no need for directors.

IN THE FUTURE there will be no need for you or me. But we will still be here.

IN THE FUTURE painting will still be a dead medium, and people will still paint.

IN THE FUTURE our children will be born more intelligent than we could ever be.

IN THE FUTURE

IN THE FUTURE everyone will be happy all of the time.

IN THE FUTURE everyone will lie to each other each and every minute of the day, and everyone will know.

IN THE FUTURE there will be no context for anything, and nothing will be in context.

IN THE FUTURE there will be no shades of grey, just facts.

IN THE FUTURE no one will know anything, and everything will be subjective and all facts will be true, in every sense.

IN THE FUTURE, the future will be out of fashion.

IN THE FUTURE the future will be in fashion, but just for 15 minutes.

I give you THE FUTURE, and goodnight. DS

Comments

  1. Someone was in a mood!

  2. Reseam says:

    I was like WTH this AM with his tweets. LOL! Sounds like he is frustrated with the media a bit huh?? Okay that’s an understatement and it sounds more like it’s more of the online blogs than anything (Lainey anyone??). It also sounds like there may be something to the fact that Rob was late (microchips??). But then again, making it so public venting on twitter, perhaps he was just playing us or the blogs. Anyway, I was laughing so hard, I think I get where Nikki was saying that some people just get him, and some don’t. (that’s paraphrasing from the online ustream).

  3. I get the impression he is unimpressed with the things some bloggers are saying about Eclipse, and about the whole reshoots thing? I think that is what this is all about anyway. Really… why is he worried about what some bloggers think? The fact that it bothers him, bothers me a bit.. if everything really is fine he should just be shrugging it all off. I dunno. Guess the proof will be in the watching come July 1.

  4. I have to say I agree and have been saying things along the same line to my close friends and family. Just look where we’ve been and look where we’re going. He’s absolutely right. Try reading 1984…the similarities to today’s society and the near future are uncanny [and it was written in the 40’s(?)].

  5. chelsea says:

    This morning (and by morning I mean 1 am) I severely regretted having his tweets sent directly to my phone through texts…I woke up 4 hours before I had to get up for my 8am class with all these random texts about the future…

    Let’s just say, half-asleep me was vveerrryyyy confused, and then very annoyed hahaha. They make a bit more sense now though. Sorta.

  6. Gina L. says:

    I LOVE IT! PERFECT!

  7. sillygirl says:

    Makes you wonder what is really going on!???

  8. Dude–have another cup of coffee!

  9. (30yearoldtwifan) says:

    Does anyone really blame him? This is ridiculous. Between Lainey, and all the rest of the GOSSIP sites, and twitter people that put there 2 sense in like they know everything must be very upsetting for him and his crew who work so hard, did you all know Punked got a helicopter and took those pics when they were trying to film. What a disaster for them all. Trying to shoot and you got big mouth no it all taking pic with a loud,, windy helicopter above. I’m sure they are all under pressure. Give the man a break Twi fans. DS is defiantly eccentric, and a perfectionist. Is that a bad thing?

  10. He clearly can’t deal with preassure from a pack of women. What’s going on??????!!!!!!! Venting his frustrations in Twitter. He should get to work. I don’t like the part about actors…Maybe he didn’t like the way Rob, Kristen and Taylor act…well too bad for him….IT’S YOUR JOB TO MAKE THEM LOOK GOOD!!!!!!!!

  11. Isn’t he just feeding the fire by tweeting ALL this stuff. Totally agree with messyrooms above: “Really… why is he worried about what some bloggers think? The fact that it bothers him, bothers me a bit.. if everything really is fine he should just be shrugging it all off.” He needs a nap.

  12. Noah Brighten says:

    I actually find his tweets amusing. I thought they were funny and a bit cheeky. I don’t know why people are fussy about them. Personally, I didn’t read his tweets as him being frustrated, but much rather making light of a rather difficult situation.

    • I completely agree! He comes across as extremely witty and, like you said, he seems to make light of a weird situation…finally someone who has something interesting to tweet!

  13. All I have to say on that is– AMAZING! Creativity and accuracy ;P

    Love it. :)

  14. ya know I think truly that this whole tangent started w/thoughts on the ipad. If you read the very beginning of the tweets it has to do w/ipad usage..then talks about apps then goes off on the rabbit trail, which makes me think that technically what we read on here is out of context and makes it seem like he’s responding to rumors. I do think that the rumor stuff influenced the direction of the tweets a bit, but that the tweets weren’t a direct reaction to the rumors.

  15. liberty says:

    I think he should stop wasting time sending tweets and get Eclipse: The Zombie Movie finished! He and scummit obviously never read Page 290 in Eclipse.

  16. Maelina says:

    These are hilarious! Very witty that David… :)

  17. Luisa Ardila says:

    What is all the fuss about?
    1. He didn’t sound really angry to me. Pessimistic? Yes. But who in the media (even internet bloggers *clears throat*) isn’t a little pessimistic about the future. I know, I go to S.I. Newhouse School of Public Communications. We talk about this all the time.
    2. I know it’s hard to comprehend, because many of us (myself included) have completely immersed ourselves in Twilight, but the man has other things in his life. He doesn’t just tweet about Eclipse. This probably has nothing to do with Eclipse. It may not even be about the Twilight blogs, so I don’t think anyone here *clears throat again* should take it offensively or dig in to it to search for negatives about the film.
    3. It’s his Twitter. He can tweet about whatever he wants. The fact that we are loosely interpreting these to be hateful tweets only deprives him of his freedom of speech and makes the whole “Twilight bloggers are haters” argument almost believable.

  18. Awesome…..and so true at the rate things are going…insightful, pointed, deep thinking.

  19. Does he not put all the rumors to rest here?

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